I think (hope) it's natural to worry about how your children will do when you take them half way round the world. Will they fit in? Will they make friends? Will they still develop and learn? Mostly out of Maggie, when I ask about preschool, I get a "good" or "fine" to "So how are things going at your school?" So I had a moment today where all my fears were annihilated....at least for the evening.
In the late afternoon, I took Maggie to the apartment pool. She is half swimming have walking on the step and saying the same things over and obver again, "ee, arh, sun, soo," It sounds Chinese but she is so casually saying it as she swims, it surprises me. I swim over and ask her. "Is that Chinese?" She gives me this look like "of course it's Chinese, you do know we live in Hong Kong now." I ask, "Did you learn that at school?" Looking like she is hoping she gets her intelligence from Katy, she kinda puts up with what she considers an obvious answer and says yes. She was counting in chinese from 1 to 10. She then stops and starts teaching me each of the numbers, correcting me as I go.
Moments like this that alay fears are very welcome.
Sunday, January 30, 2011
Saturday, January 29, 2011
Day 17: Hong Kong
Day 17 Friday: Maggie Starts New Years Celebrations
Maggie's preschool had a New Year's celebration on Friday because they are closed next week. This was her dress for the event.
Day 18: Our Outing
Today was one of those up and down days. We went to the Peak Tram, a historic finicular, or as we say in Pittsburgh, "Incline." It was a great outing. It goes to the top of one of the highest points in Hong Kong. At the top is a 6 story lookout. The lookout is on top of this multi story mall. It is quite remarkable. Everywhere in Hong Kong is a mall. Pictures on Facebook. Maggie and Nicholas were great.
At the top is a small French bistro and we had sandwiches for lunch. A little play then down the hill for naps. Then the crazy started. I swear Maggie's attitude changes so much when she stays in this 2 bedroom apartment for longer than 2 hours, it's like lockdown time at Rykers. She loses her mind. After Katy came back from the store, I took them out to the park and Maggie was fine again. But headed back to the room, I felt like a prison guard taking imates back to lockdown from the TV room.
The evening got better and she went down to sleep. Thus the peace to blog. For fun I should try to blog when the crazy hits. That outta be fun to read. Well only 28 days more here until we move into the 3 bedroom apartment which is about 1800 suqare feet. It is also 2 blocks off the city streets which would give us alot to do with them.
Katy and I keep repeating to each other, "We can't let them divide us." Did I mention school is on vacation all next week for New Years?
At the top is a small French bistro and we had sandwiches for lunch. A little play then down the hill for naps. Then the crazy started. I swear Maggie's attitude changes so much when she stays in this 2 bedroom apartment for longer than 2 hours, it's like lockdown time at Rykers. She loses her mind. After Katy came back from the store, I took them out to the park and Maggie was fine again. But headed back to the room, I felt like a prison guard taking imates back to lockdown from the TV room.
The evening got better and she went down to sleep. Thus the peace to blog. For fun I should try to blog when the crazy hits. That outta be fun to read. Well only 28 days more here until we move into the 3 bedroom apartment which is about 1800 suqare feet. It is also 2 blocks off the city streets which would give us alot to do with them.
Katy and I keep repeating to each other, "We can't let them divide us." Did I mention school is on vacation all next week for New Years?
Day 18: Over 2 Weeks Old
It's hard to believe that 18 days have gone by. In 18 days though, we have developed a routine here. The Nanny comes to the apartment at 7:45am to spend the day with Nicholas and pick up Maggie after school. Katy, Maggie and I leave the apartment at 8am. Maggie's school bus makes a stop at the apartment complex around 8:10. We see Maggie off, then hop on the shuttle bus to downtown. First stop is Katy, then my stop. The Nanny picks Maggie up at school at 3:30 and head back to the apartment. Around 5:00 Katy and I meet up at a mutual shuttle stop to head back to the apartment. The Nanny leaves and we cook dinner. Kids off to tubbies and bed, then we have maybe 2 hours of time.
The funny part about this is that this is all TEMPORARY. We move to our final apartment March 1 and have to develop a whole new routine as the school bus doesn't stop at the complex, the nanny is temporary and we will get a helper, etc.
It is the real challenge of being an expat. You really can't get all bent out of shape on what is temporary. You make due, develop a routine in the moment. You have to. then you move on to the next scenario.
The funny part about this is that this is all TEMPORARY. We move to our final apartment March 1 and have to develop a whole new routine as the school bus doesn't stop at the complex, the nanny is temporary and we will get a helper, etc.
It is the real challenge of being an expat. You really can't get all bent out of shape on what is temporary. You make due, develop a routine in the moment. You have to. then you move on to the next scenario.
Friday, January 28, 2011
Day 18: Sign that You are Becoming Local
I have heard so many answers to this question: get to know the language, you know your way around the town, you can use mass transit. Some will say it's when you get your Hong Kong ID card. But I am convinced that you know when you are becoming a local when you join in and jay walk with everyone around you. The amount of courage and tenacity it takes to jay walk determines how comfortable you are with your surroundings.
We were told, that you should never jay walk. The police will automatically fine you, maybe even take you to jail. So I dutifully stood at every corner waiting for the light to turn green before I crossed. Well at some point into my stay here, I want to say, 10 days, I gave in. People around me would glance with that "get out of my way" look or the "there are absolutely no cars coming, do you have a street crossing phobia" look and walk right by me. Over and over again. Then I just joined in. It was actually somewhat liberating as if I had joined the unspoken Hong Kong Citizens jay walking association. I wonder when I will get a welcome packet.
We were told, that you should never jay walk. The police will automatically fine you, maybe even take you to jail. So I dutifully stood at every corner waiting for the light to turn green before I crossed. Well at some point into my stay here, I want to say, 10 days, I gave in. People around me would glance with that "get out of my way" look or the "there are absolutely no cars coming, do you have a street crossing phobia" look and walk right by me. Over and over again. Then I just joined in. It was actually somewhat liberating as if I had joined the unspoken Hong Kong Citizens jay walking association. I wonder when I will get a welcome packet.
Saturday, January 22, 2011
Day 11: the Littte Funny Things
As you probably know, Lunar New Year is coming on February 3. Maggie is learning alot about it, and passing on the information to us, as preschool. Basically the color Red and loud noises scare away all the evil spirits.(Something Maggie is very OK with. Scaring away the scaries is fine by her.) But there is one other expectation...
RED LUCKY CARDS
It is expected to pass out red cards with money in them for the hotel staff, children you know, and anyone who helps you. One is expected to buy these cards (money holders) and go to the bank and get "crisp new bills" for the holders. Giving used money is I suppose bad luck. We are told $20HKD is good. Not $40 though because in Chinese "40" sounds like the word "death." Ok so need to go and buy these cards and get crisp money. Check.
Also best to have a stash of these red cards filled with $20s so you are not caught short. Check.
Everyone sells these cards so I am thinking no big deal. I approach the first diplay of cards at the department store. They have money cards that look like they can hold dollars and ones where it would look like you can to fold the money. Then I get confused. Is it OK to fold my crisp new money? Doesn't seem like it so I start looking at the larger ones. (They all have chinese characters on them. Remember that.)
A nice cleck comes over and gently lets me know that the large ones are for specific names. I give her a confused look. The chinese characters on the large ones are specific names or surnames. I laugh to myself, here I go wanting to fit in and pass out cards to the staff at the hotel all made out to "John" when I think it says "luck" on the front. I can just see them. "We thought the expats were the smart ones."
"Thank you," I say. So she looks at me and points to the smaller ones and says, "anyone cards there." "Gotcha." Anyone, yes that is who I need. But then I panic, how can I used those small ones? Do I fold these crisp bills? Is that some slight? I end up not buying any.
Afterwards I find out.."Folding the bills is OK." Have to find us some anyone cards soon.
RED LUCKY CARDS
It is expected to pass out red cards with money in them for the hotel staff, children you know, and anyone who helps you. One is expected to buy these cards (money holders) and go to the bank and get "crisp new bills" for the holders. Giving used money is I suppose bad luck. We are told $20HKD is good. Not $40 though because in Chinese "40" sounds like the word "death." Ok so need to go and buy these cards and get crisp money. Check.
Also best to have a stash of these red cards filled with $20s so you are not caught short. Check.
Everyone sells these cards so I am thinking no big deal. I approach the first diplay of cards at the department store. They have money cards that look like they can hold dollars and ones where it would look like you can to fold the money. Then I get confused. Is it OK to fold my crisp new money? Doesn't seem like it so I start looking at the larger ones. (They all have chinese characters on them. Remember that.)
A nice cleck comes over and gently lets me know that the large ones are for specific names. I give her a confused look. The chinese characters on the large ones are specific names or surnames. I laugh to myself, here I go wanting to fit in and pass out cards to the staff at the hotel all made out to "John" when I think it says "luck" on the front. I can just see them. "We thought the expats were the smart ones."
"Thank you," I say. So she looks at me and points to the smaller ones and says, "anyone cards there." "Gotcha." Anyone, yes that is who I need. But then I panic, how can I used those small ones? Do I fold these crisp bills? Is that some slight? I end up not buying any.
Afterwards I find out.."Folding the bills is OK." Have to find us some anyone cards soon.
Day 11: Reading the Tea Leaves
The past couple of days have had their ups and downs. I think the hardest part is reading our daughter Maggie. At one point she is confident and telling me,"I can go up myself and ask for more nakpins..." at the counter of the restaurant. And does and next she is missing her Teddy Bear which has become code for
"I am not alright with what is going on." Katy and I try and make the time for these sudden outbursts of "I am not OK." We even fool ourselves into believing we can now, after only 7 days, predict how a day will go.
So what has happened since last we posted?
Katy continues to settle into work and I start on Monday. We met and interviewed a nanny who will start with us Monday. She will primarily watch Nicholas for us and take care of Maggie after school before we come home for dinner. This is a short term Nanny until we transition to our permanent apartment in March.
Our air shipment arrived. I have to say it was like one of those world war 2 movies where the beleaguered paratrooper surrounded and runing out of supplies see in the distance allied aircraft coming just as they run out of food with a supply drop. Now you can of course buy everything we were waiting for in our air shipment in Hong Kong. As far as I can tell you can buy anything you want here. But we were down to our last diaper and last set of wipeys. "Please Nicholas can you hold off for another hour?" I think thanks to a little constipation, he did and our resupply of diapers, toys, clothes came without a hitch.
I suspect our routine will start to settle in this week. I think we will have it down just as we turn everything upside down again and have to move out and into our new apartment in downtown.
"I am not alright with what is going on." Katy and I try and make the time for these sudden outbursts of "I am not OK." We even fool ourselves into believing we can now, after only 7 days, predict how a day will go.
So what has happened since last we posted?
Katy continues to settle into work and I start on Monday. We met and interviewed a nanny who will start with us Monday. She will primarily watch Nicholas for us and take care of Maggie after school before we come home for dinner. This is a short term Nanny until we transition to our permanent apartment in March.
Our air shipment arrived. I have to say it was like one of those world war 2 movies where the beleaguered paratrooper surrounded and runing out of supplies see in the distance allied aircraft coming just as they run out of food with a supply drop. Now you can of course buy everything we were waiting for in our air shipment in Hong Kong. As far as I can tell you can buy anything you want here. But we were down to our last diaper and last set of wipeys. "Please Nicholas can you hold off for another hour?" I think thanks to a little constipation, he did and our resupply of diapers, toys, clothes came without a hitch.
I suspect our routine will start to settle in this week. I think we will have it down just as we turn everything upside down again and have to move out and into our new apartment in downtown.
Tuesday, January 18, 2011
Day 7: Glass is Half Full Day
You hear about people focusing on the negatives, the struggles about moving and living abroad. I think they just never wanted to to it in the first place. Well today was a good day, a glass half full day, the first normal day.
Nicholas and I took an adventure into the city to buy a mobile phone. Nicholas in stroller and me with my map ventured through the Times Square and Causeway Bay shopping areas. Alot of it hard core Hong Kong: the smells and sights of restaurants open to the sidewalk selling all kinds of foods, side streets crammed with retail and main streets full of high end luxury goods stores, people going about their normal lives in the midst of it all: the real Hong Kong.
We finally found the SmartTone-Vodafone store. I find out that they can't actually sell me a plan until I get my permanent HK ID card. But they helped me figure out I could get a phone and a prepaid sim card to have a number now until next week when I get my ID. They were very helpful. So mission accomplished, we have a HK local phone. I also ordered an iPhone. When that comes next week, I can pick it up after I get my ID card.
During the morning bus pickup we met one of Maggie's classmates who attends the same school and is staying in our building. In the afternoon, we ran into them again and shared a taxi ride back to the hotel. After we got back, Maggie wanted to go to the playroom. Who was there but her new friend. They played together for a while as I sat and talked with his dad. We agreed to switch off picking up our kids. It was nice to connect with such nice people and such a nice boy. They will only be staying in Hong Kong through the spring I think. Maggie has been trying hard to approach kids and mostly they rebuf her. Katy and I both after each time tell Maggie how proud of her we are to try. So It was nice to see her approach a nice boy and see them play together. Both talked about play dates to me and the dad.
We got back to the apartment and Katy cooked a normal Matvey dinner. I was able during the day to finish a presentation for my new job next week as well.
We were also able to connect with a potential Nanny to help us out until we find a helper in our new apartment. She seemed nice over the phone and we all will meet Saturday.
Katy learned our air shipment got through HK customs and can be delivered to us in the next couple of days which is great. The sea shipment though is delayed and may not get here till March.
There is a part of you that looks on everything you need to get done and everything that is different and thinks, "How will we ever get to having a normal day like the ones we had in Charlotte?" Well today is proof. Good night everyone.
Nicholas and I took an adventure into the city to buy a mobile phone. Nicholas in stroller and me with my map ventured through the Times Square and Causeway Bay shopping areas. Alot of it hard core Hong Kong: the smells and sights of restaurants open to the sidewalk selling all kinds of foods, side streets crammed with retail and main streets full of high end luxury goods stores, people going about their normal lives in the midst of it all: the real Hong Kong.
We finally found the SmartTone-Vodafone store. I find out that they can't actually sell me a plan until I get my permanent HK ID card. But they helped me figure out I could get a phone and a prepaid sim card to have a number now until next week when I get my ID. They were very helpful. So mission accomplished, we have a HK local phone. I also ordered an iPhone. When that comes next week, I can pick it up after I get my ID card.
During the morning bus pickup we met one of Maggie's classmates who attends the same school and is staying in our building. In the afternoon, we ran into them again and shared a taxi ride back to the hotel. After we got back, Maggie wanted to go to the playroom. Who was there but her new friend. They played together for a while as I sat and talked with his dad. We agreed to switch off picking up our kids. It was nice to connect with such nice people and such a nice boy. They will only be staying in Hong Kong through the spring I think. Maggie has been trying hard to approach kids and mostly they rebuf her. Katy and I both after each time tell Maggie how proud of her we are to try. So It was nice to see her approach a nice boy and see them play together. Both talked about play dates to me and the dad.
We got back to the apartment and Katy cooked a normal Matvey dinner. I was able during the day to finish a presentation for my new job next week as well.
We were also able to connect with a potential Nanny to help us out until we find a helper in our new apartment. She seemed nice over the phone and we all will meet Saturday.
Katy learned our air shipment got through HK customs and can be delivered to us in the next couple of days which is great. The sea shipment though is delayed and may not get here till March.
There is a part of you that looks on everything you need to get done and everything that is different and thinks, "How will we ever get to having a normal day like the ones we had in Charlotte?" Well today is proof. Good night everyone.
Sunday, January 16, 2011
Day 4 and 5: More Thoughts
We had a good first weekend. I was able to find an internet radio that streamed Steeler football. So I got to listen to the game live Sunday morning.
The move and transition is really showing on Maggie now. I think it's tougher since we are in a temp apartment building. She has moments of acting out and then being great with everything. Katy and I are then challenged with how much slack we give her before we put the hammer down. The other things are the 2 bedroom apartment and the lack of all her and Nicholas' toys. Maggie starts her first full day at preschool tomorrow. She clearly misses her friends on McDonald Ave and Dilworth and her cousins. Not a day goes by when we doesn't mention Reese, Avery, Luke, Henry, Sam, Hunter, Owen, Jack, Owen, Elizabeth, Sara, Ben..... It doesn't help that we dont have yet things for her to do like swimm lessons or ballet.
We got alot done here but so much more to do. Monday we hopefully might try and make an offer on a permenant apartment. I think the sooner we move in the better. We are also trying to interview a short term nanny so that I can get into the office next week. More to come.
The move and transition is really showing on Maggie now. I think it's tougher since we are in a temp apartment building. She has moments of acting out and then being great with everything. Katy and I are then challenged with how much slack we give her before we put the hammer down. The other things are the 2 bedroom apartment and the lack of all her and Nicholas' toys. Maggie starts her first full day at preschool tomorrow. She clearly misses her friends on McDonald Ave and Dilworth and her cousins. Not a day goes by when we doesn't mention Reese, Avery, Luke, Henry, Sam, Hunter, Owen, Jack, Owen, Elizabeth, Sara, Ben..... It doesn't help that we dont have yet things for her to do like swimm lessons or ballet.
We got alot done here but so much more to do. Monday we hopefully might try and make an offer on a permenant apartment. I think the sooner we move in the better. We are also trying to interview a short term nanny so that I can get into the office next week. More to come.
Day 4 and 5: Thoughts
You learn things functioning in a foreign country that you either take for granted in your home country or never really think through. Here is our growing list:
1. Netflix, Hulu, nbc.com, cbs.com, abc.com don't allow you to stream videos abroad. (Well at least in Hong Kong). Canceled our now worthless Netflix account. Oh and that Apple TV is pretty much mothballed. Surprising the NFL does allow international live streaming for a fee.
2. When buying a small appliances don't assume it will be easy to figure out if the manual is written in Chinese with no accompaning graphics to demonstrate use. It took Katy and I 2 days to figure out how to use the Japanese humidifier.
3. Don't underestimate the sheer drain it has on you to work through these minor challenges every day. Katy and I now collapse at 8pm.
I am sure more to come....
1. Netflix, Hulu, nbc.com, cbs.com, abc.com don't allow you to stream videos abroad. (Well at least in Hong Kong). Canceled our now worthless Netflix account. Oh and that Apple TV is pretty much mothballed. Surprising the NFL does allow international live streaming for a fee.
2. When buying a small appliances don't assume it will be easy to figure out if the manual is written in Chinese with no accompaning graphics to demonstrate use. It took Katy and I 2 days to figure out how to use the Japanese humidifier.
3. Don't underestimate the sheer drain it has on you to work through these minor challenges every day. Katy and I now collapse at 8pm.
I am sure more to come....
Thursday, January 13, 2011
Day 3: Maggie's First Day at Preschool
Maggie had a good first half day. She reported, "I cried a little for Momma, then I got comfortable and made some new friends." She wants to go back on Monday, so I think all in all a good start.
Day 2 During Wednesday Night. Small Children and Jet Lag
During Wednesday night, the kids were still adjusting to the time difference. The funny part was they seemed to time it so they traded off being up. Now I know this is not what was happening, but I could imagine Maggie turning to Nicholas and saying, "OK starting at midnight, I will call out for Mommy or Daddy(I'll switch off) every hour and you start coughing or wimpering on the half hour. Let's see how long they go before we break them. ha ha ha."
This went on until 5am when they both fell hard alseep.
This went on until 5am when they both fell hard alseep.
Day 2: Thursday January 13, 2011
What a day. Katy went off to work for her first day. Maggie, Nicholas and I spent part of the morning at the Parkview Play areas for kids. There are 4 rooms based on age group. Think Gymborees within this complex. Lunch back at the apartment.
We met up with the property management people and hopefully will find an apartment in this complex called "Bamboo Grove." We have a viewing on Monday. It's right on the city center edge. So when you visit, we can walk to the city. Fingers crossed.
Maggie had some anxiety about the first day of preschool tomorrow. She is very nervous. We are all taking her together in the morning.
We met up with the property management people and hopefully will find an apartment in this complex called "Bamboo Grove." We have a viewing on Monday. It's right on the city center edge. So when you visit, we can walk to the city. Fingers crossed.
Maggie had some anxiety about the first day of preschool tomorrow. She is very nervous. We are all taking her together in the morning.
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
Day 1: End of Day One Epilogue
Katy asked Maggie,"So how was your first day in Hong Kong?" "Actually Mommy," Maggie said, "This was not my first day in Hong Kong."
Day 1: The End of the Day
For such little sleep, we got alot done. At 8AM we went to the grocery store and bought some groceries for the next 2 days.
Then we had an appointment at the government office so that Katy and I could get our Hong Kong ID cards. Very efficient. We were out in 45 minutes. Best to make an appointment. We pick up our official ID cards on January 26.
Back to the apartment for naps. Dinner and early bed.
Then we had an appointment at the government office so that Katy and I could get our Hong Kong ID cards. Very efficient. We were out in 45 minutes. Best to make an appointment. We pick up our official ID cards on January 26.
Back to the apartment for naps. Dinner and early bed.
Day 1 (Wed January 12, 2011): It’s 3AM. Good Morning Everyone.
On the plane as Nicholas was crying and Maggie had run through the 3 age appropriate movies on the flight, Katy and I looked at each other and said, “if we get them to fall asleep on the plane, they probably won’t sleep tonight.” Like any bargain with Dr Faustus we lost. They slept on the plane for a couple hours. But got up at 3am. Good news is we were up too. We coaxed Maggie to sleep till 3:30 am ish.
So what does a family do at 4AM? Unpack of course. Setup Vonage…our old local phone works fine.
Day 0 (Tuesday January 10, 2011) Traveling with Small Children: Business Class
Now many of you may cringe at the mere thought of this crazy with a Capital C idea. But oh no, let’s double down: on an international flight to Hong Kong. Our final flight to Hong Kong was a 15 hour flight.
It all started much like a classic horror flick. Everyone is happily traveling for a weekend at Camp Crystal Lake. Nicholas was all smiles and charming the flight attendants. “Oh what a happy baby!” “ I have never seen such a happy baby.” Little did they know the horror that awaited them. Approximately 2 hours into it, he struck. Tired, worn out and done. Nicholas started crying. And crying. And crying. Katy and I both immediately looked around at how many business class passengers had headphones on. Good more than 90%. Of course the 10% look at us with at least 2 thoughts in their minds: 1. What negligent parents. And 2. How dare they sit in business class. Nicholas melted down during the lunch service. “ Should we hold your meal?” Yeah I think so.
Katy says, “Ok let’s recline this seat into a bed.” In the midst of the melt down his seat stopped reclining. No worries, a flight attendant says I’ll just reset the computer. Reset and still no recline. Reset again. No luck. “Ok,” our flight attendant Jill (I suppress her real name to protect the innocent), there is a manual lever. So the picture is this: the flight attendant bending down and reaching her arm into the side of the seat for a manual lever while I am standing on the seat and trying to jam the head rest down and Katy is rocking, yes, a crying Nicholas.
Where is Maggie amid all this……watching Chicken Little quietly in her seat.
Then much like a sudden storm, Nicholas suddenly falls dead asleep and the seat finally un jams. Crisis averted. I sit down exhausted. “Can we bring your meal now?” “Yes,” I say. A wonderful salmon and rice. I sit down, unfold my tray table cover myself with a napkin, reach for my fork and hear Maggie say, “I have to go to the potty Daddy.”
Chardonnay does take the edge off.
It’s 4 hours into it and Nicholas is still asleep, Katy is trying to sleep and Maggie is watching TV. Only 10 hours to go……
Day 0 (Tuesday January 10, 2011): Traveling with Small Children The Airport
I have found that when you travel with small children you will encounter 2 types of people at airports: the Real and the Righteous. The Real people really feel for your stress of trying to get from the front door of an airport to the gate. “You forgot to take Nicholas’ milk out of your bag before you when through security…no worries.” Or “Maggie needs to go potty while the plane is still reaching cruising altitude that the Captain has not turned off the seat belt sign? Well we don’t want an accident do we.” Those are the Real. Real people who have been there before. “Just leave the baggage cart here.” “Can I give you a hand?”
Then comes the Righteous. You can see these people a mile away. They give you the “How did you ever think you could travel by air with 2 small children and it not be a disaster?” Or “I see you are trying to get your kids shoes off while they are crying and hungry, but you are delaying the rest of us VERY IMPORTANT PEOPLE FROM OUR VERY IMPORTANT WORK.”
I usually smile with the smile that says, “Yes you just saw me bribe my child with ice cream to get her through security.” Or “yes I just let her watch Hanna Montana on the portable DVD for the 12th time because we are delayed here for another hour.”
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